What Does Future You Think About Your Current Choices? (Encore)
Michelle Fox: [00:00:00] Happy New Year, my friend. Oh my goodness. We have made it. And at the time of this recording, I am taking time off with my family. So this is prerecorded. I just wanted to pop into your ear buds to let you know, I am thinking of you. I am celebrating all of the possibilities of 2024 right now. And that is actually the reason why I chose to do a replay of this episode. It is with my beautiful friend.
Amarilis Garcia.
And she asks a question, which I have found so helpful over the past year, which is what does a future you think about your current choices? And so, because this has touched my heart so deeply, I felt like this was the best way to help my friends hearts open and expand with that question.
Like truly. What does future you think about your [00:01:00] current choices?
So enjoy my friend and know that I have a fresh episode coming
January 9th. We've got a powerhouse. You do not want to miss this one. So if you are not already following Nourish with Michelle Fox on your favorite podcast platform. Please do that now so that you do not miss an episode. We are in this together, and I want to be here for you.
I want to support you and to help energize and elevate. You. Alright, here we go.
Let's listen to our rewind of episode 23 with Amarilis Garcia. What does future you think about your current choices?
Amarilis Garcia: Some of the tools that I, I offer, it's really sitting down and loving self in a way you would love somebody else. If I make a promise to a family member or if I make a promise to a friend, or if I make a promise to a coworker or my boss, I'm gonna [00:02:00] show up. because there's a consequence of their reaction to me not being a.
If I say, I'm going to meet you here, I'm going to do, so if I say, Hey, I'm gonna prepare lunch for you so you don't have to worry about it, I do that because I care about you. Why don't I do that same thing for myself? Like, Hey, wait a minute, Amarilis I really love you and I want you to eat well. I want to give you what your body needs to be healthy so I can promise you that I'm gonna make lunch for you, so that way you have it and you don't have to stress about it. Like literally talking to myself that way. Like when I don't want to, like, ugh, I, I promised myself I was gonna get up to go to the gym, but I really don't wanna do that. Like, I really just don't, it doesn't matter. Like I'm just gonna sleep in because it's just like nobody's waiting for me.
Michelle Fox: It's a big deal. Right? No, because I said I was gonna take care of. Not because I, I need you to look fly. It's because I [00:03:00] want you to feel good and you're important to me. Welcome to Nourish with Michelle Fox, your guide to a vibrant life. If consistency has been a challenge for you and you occasionally forget self-care, you, my friend are in the right place. Tune in for weekly inspiration to nourish your mind. I know your plate's full and I want to help you support a life and a body that you adore. Let's dig in.
I am so thrilled to introduce you to my friend Amarilis Garcia, and I can truly say friend with a capital F. I met this beautiful spirit in Bali last year, 2022, and I don't even think I've shared this with her, but what I will share with her right now and with you before I officially bring her on is that [00:04:00] Amarilis
was that calm in the storm And yes, you think of Bali the Beauty. Yes, there was that. And if you have followed me at all on Instagram, @michellefoxlove wink, wink. Go through if you haven't seen it. But you will see these beautiful photos of not only Amarilis but the six other women that traveled with us.
And I have to say we were a motley crew. When we were exploring new land, new territory, for most of us in the circle, I would just look over and Amarilis would always be the calm one.
So she was, you know, doing her meditations on the bus, you know, sometimes we were traveling an hour and a half, two hours to get to our location and, and she had her EarPods and you could just see her swaying with her eyes closed. And so she was like this calm touchpoint there. In the mornings when I would wake up, I noticed she was over in the beautiful green grass doing her yoga that she did [00:05:00] every single morning, and so I so admired that commitment.
I will say, even at the dinner table, she just had this presence that when, again, I'd look over, I'm like, Yes, like that. That's the energy she embodies the energy that I aspire to. And so before I officially share this beauty with you, let me read her bio just so you know who we are talking to in this conversation.
So, Amarilis believes in the power of community and storytelling and healing connections with self and others. She offers creative. A space to explore their inner strength to heal through E M D R therapy, yoga circles, and non-judgment. I imagine that's another reason why I was so attracted to her in this circle.
I, I felt always included and, and never judged. She claims that she is an active introvert. [00:06:00] She is also a yoga instructor and she is a licensed mental health counselor. And so ladies and gentlemen, I introduce you to Amarilis Garcia.
Welcome my friend.
Amarilis Garcia: Yay. I am so excited to be here. That was really nice. just sitting here listening. I was like, oh, you know, like we shared experiences together, but you know, people have different perceptions or thoughts, so it's interesting always to to hear how people perceive you, cuz we have our own thoughts in our own head.
So that was really pleasant. I was really, really kind and I appreciate
Michelle Fox: it, Michelle. Oh my goodness, my pleasure. Thank you for joining me for this conversation. I have. So many questions.
For this conversation and the wisdom I want to share with my community is I wanna talk more about mindset because I know not only are you licensed, but you have the lived experience on changing mindset to.
A [00:07:00] life that you love and that I understand we're all on this journey and this process, but. A lot of my clients and participants in my programs, they can grasp onto the nutrition information that I share. But as far as putting it into place, I'm really finding it's a lot about self-worth. It's all of, well, a lot about being willing to put our needs first, and so I wanna jump into that.
But first, . I wanna have some fun with you. Are you open to some rapid fire questions? Really? Okay. Sweet . So let's ask a biz question first. Inbox zero or inbox 10,000.
Amarilis Garcia: Neither .
Michelle Fox: Talk to me about that. I
Amarilis Garcia: don't. I just don't. Maybe it's 10,000. Maybe that's the answer. Cuz. I don't, I don't do emails very well, ,
Michelle Fox: and there you have it . Next [00:08:00] question. Favorite movie of all time.
Amarilis Garcia: I don't have favorites. I just like things, so I don't have favorites. Anytime anybody asks me a favorite, I'm like, I just like things
Michelle Fox: that goes back to the, the non-judgment piece in your bio, which is so true. You're like, I will just accept all of it. . I don't
Amarilis Garcia: accept all of it. Some of it could go
Michelle Fox: away. Ok. Ok. . I I like that too. I don't have favorites,
Amarilis Garcia: but there's, so. You said rapid fire. I'm stuck at this, . I do, I do like avatar, like the blue people, not Avatar, the Airbender.
And I just came off, like, I just like stories. I also like, black Panther. I'm into the M C U, don't judge. I know people have their thoughts, but I can be an Mc un just because. The stories are so rich. I love it. I love
Michelle Fox: it. So, and for those of us that don't know what an M C U is, what is that? Marvel
Amarilis Garcia: Cinematic universe.
So that's Avengers and Black [00:09:00] Panther and or, and all of the rich. Nerdy goodness.
Michelle Fox: Don't tell my teenagers that. I just ask you that question. Listen, you can just edit that
Amarilis Garcia: part. You could pretend you could pretend like you already knew
Michelle Fox: there. That's a cool mom. Yeah. Yeah.
Amarilis Garcia: Say that its questionable
Michelle Fox: and I told you she's my friend. She keeps it real . Okay, next question. Sweet, salty, or savory.
Amarilis Garcia: Listen, all of it. .
Michelle Fox: That's
Amarilis Garcia: my girl. All of it. Okay. All of it. Because when you combine it, if you know what you're doing, which I don't, I just appreciate what people do. That's why I got Michelle in my corner. But all of it.
Michelle Fox: All of it. Love it. And on that note, kind of another nod to Bali. I remember you corrected me because. We had something spicy and I made reference to you being [00:10:00] Puerto Rican, and you're like, no, you're like, actually our food isn't that spicy . No, for my friends, I'll save you. So you don't make that mistake again if you, if you have a new Puerto Rican friend.
The food is not generally spicy, is that correct?
Amarilis Garcia: No. I mean, you can make it, you know. . you can make it spicy if you like, but we always have like the, the, so like the hot sauce on the side, cuz generally like the cuisine is not spicy, so we don't really cook with like chili peppers or things like that.
It's more like the sweet peppers or green bell peppers and cilantro and things like that. Some garlic. So that's as spicy as it gets.
Michelle Fox: Yeah, that, that's amazing. And I lo I always love learning new things, so thank you for correcting me. Yeah, girl. Cuz
Amarilis Garcia: I was like, I'm gonna do this spicy stuff.
Michelle Fox: uhhuh, . All right, well, speaking of your culture, your heritage, last question, would you be willing to share it? One of your favorite childhood memories in the. Ooh, in the
Amarilis Garcia: kitchen, [00:11:00] easy dancing in the kitchen. Do people not do that? Because I'm like, it's not even about the cooking. Okay. . It's not even about the cooking, it's just the dancing in the kitchen.
That's, that's it, you know. there's food always around and it's part of it, but it's about the joy of playing and experimenting and dances is part of it for me. So that's,
Michelle Fox: And I know, I guess I just can't stop talking about Bali, just looking at you cuz all these like beautiful memories are memories like back Yes,
And one of my favorite reels that Putu, our photographer there posted was of you dancing on the balcony at the beach club. I'm like, yes. Like he got the music just red and your body was flowing just red. I'm like, yes. Like that. That is what embodied our Bali experience right there.
Amarilis Garcia: That, that, that memory and that experience in that moment, cuz it was all of us.
It was [00:12:00] such a nice vibe. Like the space, there was just freedom. We can let our guard down. And for me, dance is as an expression of that. It's that joy, that peace, that freedom. So I can't go to the grocery store without, without dancing. I don't like, I'm in the produce section and I'm just bopping. I didn't realize this until my brother's like, what are you doing?
Like, enjoy my life. Leave me alone. So it's ?
Michelle Fox: Yes. It's, it's part of it. That brings me so much joy to hear because Yes. That, that is back to my teenage, like, don't the music if you don't expect me to dance, like why Thank you. And I don't even need the music. I'm like, we're just dancing. I, I can create the music in my head,
And I was gonna say, back to my teenagers, making fun of me, they already know, like if we're in the kitchen or in a restaurant, mama's gonna be dancing. I can't just walking down
Amarilis Garcia: the street, it's like, it's in Spanish. There's a, a phrase called, which means [00:13:00] you have the music within, so it's like you don't need the music on the outside.
You're just walking to your own beat. You're just like going, it's just part of it. Mm-hmm. . Yes.
Michelle Fox: I love that and I love you. Thank you for sharing that. And that actually leads into what I wanted to talk to you about and share some of your wisdom with my community is this idea of Whole Person Health.
As you know, I could talk 24 7 around nutrition and. In my humility, I understand there's more to health than just our food. It is a big deal, however. Mm-hmm. mental health is huge and the more I am maturing in my career and working with clients, I see that. Yes. We, most of us actually know the types of food to eat for our body, and those of us that don't, of course I've got to, and we can talk about that.
Mm-hmm. However, a lot of mind blocks can come into being consistent with treating our bodies well and putting the right foods in. [00:14:00] And so with the work that you do, do you have any tools or any suggestions to help us do the things that, you know, quote unquote we know we're supposed to be doing to our bodies and for our bodies?
Amarilis Garcia: it's a lot because it's deep. we, we may know what we need to do, and for the most part, people can give you like, I know I need to eat these things. I know I have to do these things, but the block is not, is not the lack of that knowledge. Sometimes it is, but when we have the knowledge, And are not able to really, , Implement it.
It's, it's usually deep re like rooted into our, our belief system. At some point in our life, we had learned, , that I can't or I don't deserve. I'm not enough or I need to learn more, or I'm powerless, it's out of my control. , all [00:15:00] these things that feed that behavior, it's not a just, oh, you know, I could just get up and do it.
I may be able to do that for maybe a week, , but the consistency is where the love is. That's what I really, really find. When you think of people you love or the relationships in which you feel most intimate and close, , it's the everyday things that, these relationships. Offer you. It's a sitting down on a couch and just being with that person or , sharing a meal, right?
It's not so much the grand gestures, even though they're really nice. Like, oh my gosh, let's go to Italy. Like, heck yeah, take me to Italy, let's go. Right? those are exciting, but if we do those grand gestures, maybe once or twice, You don't feel as much love as if this person were every day just sitting checking on how you're doing today,
Michelle Fox: Michelle, you know?
Mm-hmm. . Mm-hmm. . That's my love language right there. You just asked me how am I doing and [00:16:00] I'm, I'm butter for you. I'm like, thank you for checking in that that feeds, that feeds a really deep need for me, so carry on. But yes, thank you for saying that. It's
Amarilis Garcia: so important to be seen. every day to have the, the little nuances and, and recognize who you are in the simple, regular, ordinary, everyday experiences. And what I see is, A lot of times, again, we know things, but we can't implement some. It's, it's that block of, , the consistencies, the block of being able to show up for myself, not because I don't want to, but because maybe, , I, I don't think I, I should, other people are more important, , than, than what I need in this moment.
I think. Some of the tools that I, I offer, it's really sitting down and loving self in a way you would love somebody else. If I make a promise to a family member or if I make a promise to a friend, or if I make a promise to a coworker or my [00:17:00] boss, I'm gonna show up.
Michelle Fox: right?
Amarilis Garcia: I'm gonna show up because there's a consequence of their reaction to me not being a.
If I say, I'm going to meet you here, I'm going to do, so if I say, Hey, I'm gonna prepare lunch for you so you don't have to worry about it, I do that because I care about you. Why don't I do that same thing for myself? Like, Hey, wait a minute, Amarilis I really love you and I want you to eat well. I want to give you, what your body needs to be healthy so I can promise you that I'm gonna make.
, lunch for you, so that way you have it and you don't have to stress about it. Like literally talking to myself that way. Like when I don't want to, like, ugh, I, I promised myself I was gonna get up to go to the gym, but I really don't wanna do that. Like, I really just don't, it doesn't matter. Like I'm just gonna sleep in because it's just like nobody's waiting for me.
It's a big deal. Right? No, because I said I was gonna [00:18:00] take care of. Not because I, I need you to look fly. It's because I want you to feel good and you're important to me. , so it's having sometimes those conversations, with self and it always helps when you have somebody else who can hold you accountable as well.
Michelle Fox: So I'm thinking of a client in particular, only because this has been the most recent, that she's come to me, but. I, I'm seeing some trends in a lot of the women that I work with. I'll tell you, my community is typically women between 45 and 55 who are going through a lot of hormonal changes, dealing with menopause, but also dealing with big transitions in their life, whether they're, going through a divorce or their teenagers are leaving the house.
, you know, aging, aging through, aging out. , but I'm just finding this, this time period, myself included. I recently turned 50, like, yeah, there's a [00:19:00] lot going on. I know. Dance for that really we'll. We'll definitely pause for that. . Yes. Total side note. I've been looking forward to being 50 or forever it feels like.
And now that I'm here, it, it's bigger and better than what I, it's a celebration. , yes, I'm still celebrating. It was back in November. I'm still celebrating today, . But with that said, just to give some members some practical tools who might be listening. , this client came to me and her daughter is 14.
She's married and she really wants to lose weight because she knows that if she's going to be eating better, she's going to have more energy to show up for herself. We've been talking about the foods that she can eat, kind of more particularly a lot of the foods that she probably wants to avoid, like the sugar, the wheat, and the gluten.
And so she's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, I get that. I actually have been through nutrition school [00:20:00] myself, so I know she's like, I just haven't found a way to start making those changes. And so, in the moment. When she first came to me, I didn't quite have the language. And we've been working, you know, slowly together and, and I've been figuring that that out.
But I would love maybe a little bit more of your input, like if she came to you mm-hmm. and said, you know, , I want to lose weight. I want to stop having these hot flashes. I want to feel more proud of my body when I'm walking through the streets, or I'm on the stage, or the things that she's doing in her world.
How do I make that mindset shift to actually do something to care for myself. . Yeah. ,
Amarilis Garcia: it's a beautiful question because it's, it can be very life-changing, , when you're talking about the clientele that works with you, and that space of transition, , it's redefining your identity in a lot of ways and your why.
So if my why and my purpose has been to [00:21:00] serve and care and nurture other people, And sacrificing myself in order to put them first once I have that space, and no longer have that role because now they're self-sufficient. They're growing up. They can take care of themselves. Now, what is my purpose now?
Who am I? Because I have been the caretaker for decades,
Michelle Fox: you know, and it's, I'm getting full body goosebumps right now. Yes. Yes, it's
Amarilis Garcia: meaningful.
It's a lot of relearning and accepting that we're constantly evolving and changing. You're supposed to, your living, any living thing is going to be changing. That's what life is. We expand and we contract, we expand, and then we contract again. That's it. Part of it. So, those are those seasons in life of recognizing, okay, now that I no longer [00:22:00] have this role, , or the role has changed.
How do I in the space of introspection in the space where I'm, I pause. Now, what does this mean for me? I get to redefine. What, what my, my identity or my purpose is. When I say purpose, it seems really big, but one of the things that I do work with my clients on when we're trying to redefine this in transitions and really understand what is, , what are your values?
What's really important to you? What's gonna help, , feel that that change. Sometimes it's thinking about your future self and when I'm able to, Think and go fast forward and see elder me like, and I always do like the longest number, like the highest number I can think of. Like imagine yourself like 97 year old Michelle.
Imagine old lady Michelle sitting in her rocker, just looking up in the sky and reflecting [00:23:00] on all that she's lived through. What would you want for. . When you see 97 year old Michelle at the, like at the end of life just reflecting, what would you want for her? Physically, mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and socially?
Like we have different needs. So when I'm thinking about my physical aspect, it ties into how I feel, emotionally, mentally, how I feel, in my relationships and when I'm able to say, well, I want, I want older, older, Michelle to be healthy. . And what does that look like? You know, being specific, what does that look like for Well, that, you know, she, she can breathe easy.
She can move, she can still dance. I want her to be surrounded by people that she loves to hang out with her friends. I want her to be, Financially stable so that when she can, she has health concerns, she can [00:24:00] address them and have the right resources. So you have this vision, you you go into that, and then I go backwards from that if I want to be healthy and fluid in my movements and able to have the energy to dance and to play with my grandkids and to do those.
What can I do today? And it becomes one thing because I know sometimes we are like, oh, I have to do all these things. I have to change everything. That's overwhelming. But if I can plant one seed today, right now, how do I gift that to elder me? How do I practice being healthy and free today? What's one thing I can do today?
And that may just be, well today, I promise I'm going to drink my water. That's one step into that health mindset. Tomorrow I wake up tomorrow, I promise I'm going to drink water again cuz that's as much as I could do. [00:25:00] And you may have the same problems every single day. But it's the, , the consistency. We come back to that, the consistency of those small little steps getting you to the big picture.
, I may just be like, I'm good like two weeks from now. I'm like, listen, everybody drink what? I woke up and I'm like, You know what my body's feeling, my body, my body feels like it needs to move. So today I promise I'm just going to move. I'm not gonna go to the gym because I don't feel like it, I don't want, like, I'm not feeling that, but today I'll move.
I can take a walk around the neighborhood or I can really just do some stretches. I'm gonna move my body intentionally. So it's sometimes that, that, , combination of forward thinking of what's the real reason I'm doing this? What is what? My gift then to that, , that elder me. How can I, how can I care for her or him as I am living in my now today?
Michelle Fox: Hmm. Oh my goodness. That is so powerful. [00:26:00] I just wanna rewind a bit because I am taking copious notes. If you saw my desk right now, you'd see all these sticky notes. I'm like, Ooh, Emma really says the dropping and the wisdom. So the consistency is where the love is, that that's where you started. And yes and amen.
You talked about loving me as I would love a friend. Yes and amen. The I really love you. I think that's a beautiful practice. For us to look in the mirror and say that, I know that can be really hard for people, especially for some of us who weren't raised hearing that every day and maybe weren't in that environment.
So I really love you. I love that you said, what can I do today? I'm looking at 97 year old Michelle. And yes, I want her healthy. I want her happy. I want her surrounded by loving relationships. I want her in a body where she can still have the freedom to [00:27:00] move the way she wants to move. And so what can I do today?
And look at those small steps. . That is amazing. What else am I missing? Because I just, I mean, you dropped the mic. Like I think maybe this, this interview's over already. I, I don't know. We're done. It's a wrap. It's a wrap. I sincere. You have my word. I am going to practice this starting today, specifically the last gem you dropped, which is what can I do today?
Because it does, like, I, I don't mind sharing. I've, I've shared sadly a couple too many times already, but coffee, I struggle with coffee and you know, I could spend the whole 30 minutes talking about the pros and the cons cuz I still believe there's some health benefits to coffee. However, for my body, Doesn't do me any favors for various reasons.
And so I keep saying, I'm gonna release it. I'm gonna [00:28:00] release it. And so every morning I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah, but I have this reason why I need that. You know, burst of caffeine. Tomorrow will be the day I start and. No, cuz 97 year old Michelle, you know, going this route, she's still gonna be drinking coffee and she is probably gonna have really low bone density.
She's probably gonna be carrying more weight than she wants to be carrying . Her hormones are gonna be whacked out. Mm-hmm So I'm really gonna start journaling and practicing to look at, you know, what can I gift to Michelle at 97 years old because cuz I already love her thinking of her like that.
And as you said, , the consistency is where the love is. And if I'm gonna be loving her, I wanna be making consistent choices now to, to reach her and to love on her.
Amarilis Garcia: Yeah. It, it becomes an act of love. Like we think of love languages. Some people are, are aware of different love languages, like the physical touch acts of service, quality time, , gifts and words.[00:29:00]
If that's what I know my love language is, we can also gift that to ourselves. And I think of love in and also the consistency, like we said, but there is, , the love in, in discipline and, and , moderation too. When you think about how you love your children, you give them good. Because you want them to be healthy and you love them, you give them a bedtime because you know they do better when they're rested and you love them.
You want to care for them, so there's discipline. You correct them because you love them, and at the same, you may correct them. You may also give them things that are not really necessary. You may give them some ice cream because there's joy in that because we don't do it all the time, you know? there is that 80 20, so I may not have coffee today because I love you, Michelle.
[00:30:00] Right. I care for you, Michelle, and I know this makes you sick, so I'm not going to do that. But I see that you're yearning for so. Something coffee provides you, brings you joy, and that could be the caffeine boost, that could be your rituals that you created around a cup of coffee. Am I sitting down and able to slow down a bit because I can.
Really sit with the warmth of it and it feels good in my body for that moment. Is it the social aspect? Is it, there's so many things. It's, it's not always just about that one thing. And if I could find something that replaces it and does that function for you? Does that job for you? maybe not always at, in an exact way, but in a way that.
Is as good, or maybe even better. Sometimes it makes it easier for me to, to change my behavior without feeling [00:31:00] like I am depriving myself. Mm-hmm. , can I have tea? Is that, does that work for my body? Does that give me the same things? Maybe, maybe not. Is there another thing that I can do? If it's the slowdown, what can I do in that moment then to give me the slowdown without hurting my body?
So sometimes it's not eliminating things completely and then suffering, and I'm like this, this stinks. I can't do diets. This is why diets don't work. , because there are still things that you're receiving and gaining from those behaviors. I just gotta figure out what that is from me and find a replacement.
And there is the experimentation with. Just to be curious and see what that feels like for you, what that may be for you. Again, that comes back to the loving part of you, of relating to yourself as you love someone. You get to know them a little bit. You're like, oh, you like this, you like that? Okay, cool, cool, cool.
, lemme do more of that. , it's the [00:32:00] same thing with ourselves of like, well, What is it about coffee that I really, really enjoy? Is it the caffeine? If it's the caffeine, let me try to figure out different ways. If it's not, what is, what else could it be? Could it be the alone time? That warmth, that just, what could it be?
Let me be curious and figure it out and experiment and see, oh, that felt really nice. I like that. I'm
Michelle Fox: gonna do that again. Hmm. I'm just breathing all that in right now because I used to love. Drinking herbal tea. Mm-hmm. , I went crazy. You know, looking for new flavors and, and new health aspects. And everything you're saying right now is making me more curious about some new tea that I can buy.
In fact, I, I have a friend who has an apothecary and, and I'd love to go explore with her and support her business and so I do believe that would make it feel like a win-win for me. Mm-hmm. , thank you for [00:33:00] giving me. Yeah, that renewed curiosity. It's exciting.
Amarilis Garcia: It's like dating yourself when you think Mm. And like we talked about earlier, we're living beings, which means we are always changing and we don't like to think about that cuz it's just like I found a routine, I found a way that works for me, and now all of a sudden I'm in a different decade of my life and why, why what I've been doing doesn't work.
Because you're changing, you're still growing up . , so it's like that self-discovery always of like, wait, this is no longer working. I'm in a deeper, stage of my relationship with self. I get to learn about me again. Let me discover and it's exciting.
Michelle Fox: That is so exciting, especially because I think the default, especially for women is we typically say, well, what's wrong with us?
You know, to not to beat a dead horse, but you know, what's wrong with me? Why can't I release coffee? [00:34:00] And it's so loving the way you said that. You know, my hormones are changing, so it's not about me not being able to drink the coffee. It's, well, I'm changing, so let me be curious about, I'm a new woman. One of the things I can change to, to keep the joy flowing.
Yes, you were right. Because as a 50 year old woman, I am very clear. I do not wanna go back to my twenties like this. This is way more enjoyable than, than back there. And so, I, wow. Like I feel like I'm getting my own therapy session right now. Am I'll send you the bill
Amarilis Garcia: later. No worries. ,
Michelle Fox: please do. Please do send.
I'll give you my address when we, when we get off of here, you can just send me the invoice . Cause this truly is so healing for me because, and also, You know, putting that mirror up cuz I often share it with my clients. You know, this isn't about taking something away, let's talk about the foods we can add in to help you feel better.
And so I'm preaching this information, but the way you just. Shared that with me. I'm like, oh yeah, [00:35:00] I'm changing too. Let, let me re reimagine the things that bring me joy as a 50 year old versus what brought me joy as a 40 year old even. Mm-hmm. Thank you. Thank you.
Amarilis Garcia: Is so differently. We're talking about decades and years, but day to day we're fluctuating.
Within the day we fluctuate, right? Yes. curiosity, I think of. When you think of your children, you want them to grow. , you expect them to evolve and change. And it's a little easier because we can see those changes a little bit more quickly in , kids and teens. Right? Especially when you're noticing like, oh my gosh, my baby is grown so much, man, I have to change their whole wardrobe cuz they don't fit in it anymore.
Can you step grow for a little bit? , yep. But there's that, that expectation that they're going to change and their interests are changing because their ages are changing. We are too. You know what worked for you was great. It doesn't mean [00:36:00] it's, it's bad now that it doesn't work for you. I was like, oh man, it doesn't work that, that, that meal doesn't work for me.
Or that workout, right? Gym doesn't work for me or like makeup and this clothes doesn't work for me anymore. Why? There's like, we can default to like, what? There's something wrong with me. No, no, no. There's nothing wrong actually. It's the beautiful part of you that you're evolving and growing and changing, like that's healthy.
Michelle Fox: Thank you, and I know that you recently wrote a book, is it titled From Stuck to Empowered? Do we have some of these Juicy Gems dropped in that book? Yeah, man.
Amarilis Garcia: yes, because it's, , from stuck to empowered, a mental health counselor's confessions and self-love strategies. Hmm. So lovely. There are these, these practices and I, I share.
My, my experiences because sometimes when we come [00:37:00] in and we're like, a therapist is a professional Yeah. And human. So just because I'm able to share things doesn't mean that the human part doesn't also struggle with the showing up consistently for, for myself. So it's, it's normalizing the imperfect self-care.
Hmm. , that. When we know better, we do better and also have the grace to recognize doing better sometimes being able to respond differently when I am not in my best self. , that's love. That's love. So there's, there's , you know, reflections, there's practices, there's, , different resources. Some you may know, some , may be new to you cuz it's not really about, oh my gosh, I need to know all the things.
it's about, let me pick the one thing and practice that mm-hmm. , , and be consistent with that and see how I respond. [00:38:00]
Michelle Fox: Oh, beautiful. I can tell you already, I'm picking the one thing which is loving on 97 year old Michelle. You have seriously blown my mind with that example . Yes,
Amarilis Garcia: I love it. I dunno, what's your vision of your 90 self like?
I don't, when you look at 97 year old Michelle, what do you see?
Michelle Fox: She lives in California. She is warm. She is vibrant. She's still taking her daily walks. She is eating organic foods daily. Her children love her. She still loves the children. She is. Loving on her man. I paused. Cause I'm like, what do you want me to hear?
Say that. But yes, he, he's a, I'm, I married a younger man, so I plan for him to still be around when I'm 97 as well. , it's all up for life. Yes. Yes. walks on the beach. Still able to walk my dog. yeah, I I [00:39:00] feel like she, she has a lot. Joy in her life, and she still has a rich community and she's in this physically healthy body that she's able to still show up in the ways that she wants to, like she has freedom and she has choice to, to do the work she wants to be doing in the world.
It's so beautiful.
Amarilis Garcia: It's so beautiful. Like it's, it's so filling. Mm-hmm. . because when I think of my older. It's like peace. There's calmness. There's wisdom, right? And there's community and health and just, just ease, right? And I think if that's what's really important to me, then how do I practice that today?
How do I practice ease today so she's not dealing with all of the stress and the effects of that, because that's all I've been living, right? but then there's also the. Peace in the community. Well then how do I [00:40:00] contribute and how do I receive the community? How do I practice that now so she can have the fruits of that later?
Hmm.
Michelle Fox: Yeah. Hmm. So then, speaking of community, how can my community get our hands on your book and, and where can we find you?
Amarilis Garcia: easy. You can just find me on Instagram, like . , it's an easy space. , it's at Amma Garcia, but it's a M as in Mary, a a a
Michelle Fox: Garcia. Beautiful. And we will be sure to post this in the show notes as well as at michellefox.com/podcast.
And is there anything else you wanna share before we.
Amarilis Garcia: That it's been a joy being here. Like it's, it's really, it's really nice to, to share this space with you to just laugh and connect, but also, , just commune. . [00:41:00] So it's a joy and I'm glad that you brought me on, so thank you.
Michelle Fox: Mm, my pleasure. Thank you for being you, and thank you for being my friend with a capital F
Amarilis Garcia: girl. Yes, girl. My pleasure. I love it.
Michelle Fox: thanks so much for listening to Nourish. Have you been driving, doing laundry or walking around the neighborhood? Sweet. I've got show notes for you. Hop on over to michellefox.com/podcast. When you are ready. I will let you know that on the page, you will find resources to support what you just learned on today's show. And then of course you can grab some health supportive freebies as well.
If you enjoyed this episode, I would be honored. If you would leave a review on whichever podcast platform you are listening on. It will help me with my mission [00:42:00] to build healthier communities. One person at a time and it will help you because you will be part of that mission.
I'll be back next week and I encourage you to keep showing up for yourself and know that you and your health matter. Big love!
